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adventures of Manni the wonderdog

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The Dangerous Wildlife of Northern Germany

Hello good people of far away!

My mom gave me permission to take over her blog again (actually she said I am allowed to do anything I want nowadays). I have been meaning to give you a little lesson on the dangerous wildlife over here since apparently other people have been telling stories about things like vultures and Gators and banjos and other things I’ve never heard about so obviously these stories can’t be true.

I have been meaning to tell you about this sooner but BOY! I just can’t seem to get a rest at my palace! Me mom just never stops! I’ve been poked, pulled, pricked and prodded waaay too much, we’re constantly going places and all she ever seems to be doing is take pictures. She calls it “capturing moments”. Whatever that means. Also, I’ve had a few moments where I just wasn’t feeling like doing much. I am thankful she lets me sleep at least during those times. Sleep makes everything better after all.

So when I’m not asleep the folks usually get one of my Royal Carriages and take me places, so I get around enough to be able to tell you A LOT about our dangerous wildlife!

I am on the lookout, wildlife, you!

I told you about the wabbits already. I don’t think they are indigenous to here, I really do think they were sent all the way over the big water from Wooby Woo. Me mom told me all about that! But she caught them and we sent them back. So there!

So one place where I like to go and make mom take me is my private beach. I mean, I own it after all, so we should go, right? Mom said it’s a good workout for her to push me there in my carriage and I agree. I need her to be fit, nobody needs lazy jesters, right? So we had a nice relaxing morning there

when all of a sudden I hear something:

 

what’s that?

I had to go look. Mom’s good for a few things but guarding the properties isn’t one of them. I almost couldn’t believe my eyes! the gall!!

You’re kidding!?!

Sheep?? On my beach?? Wow. I was going to go after them and chase them back to the stupid levy they came from but my mom jumped up and tackled me to the ground. Can you imagine that?? The insolence of that!!

So a few days later we were out and about yet again and came upon two women who were walking what I at first thought were their rulers, I mean, dogs. Until we came closer…

Hey! It’s playthings! They brought me goats to play with!

Once again, mom interfered. Are you detecting a theme here, too?? She tells me I’m allowed to do everything I want from now on and it seems she’s lying. I’ll show her. I am scheming as I am writing this…

While I’m at it: a pretty regular part of the dangerous wildlife here is what I’ll show you in the next two pictures. I think those pictures are old because I look a little different nowadays. I think. I was always gorgeous though, obviously that hasn’t changed. The first one is an animal that I was made to grow up with. I had one of those as a friend for a long time but he’s not around anymore. Don’t know where he went. The dangerous bit about them is actually their breath. Let me tell you, those things always want to come close with their huge noses and blow their stinky, hot breath into my eyes! However, the rear part of those things can be pretty yummy in many aspects! See?

Horsees can be yummy!

The next one is just, phew! I don’t know. They must be indigenous because we see them all the time (mom calls them moohs) but they are SO sneaky!! You always have to watch your back(side) with them!

Oy!!

One of the most dangerous creatures of all of Germany lives in my yard. I am not kidding! I let him stay because, well, frankly? He can really hurt your nose. Not like the stinky-breath of the horsees does but in a prickly, ouchy kind of a way! Nowadays we’ve come to an agreement. I let him stay and ignore him and he doesn’t hurt me. We’re cool now. Can you say that about your dangerous animals? Huh? I’m a big diplomat, I am! That’s an important skill to have! (Spread the word, friends 🙂 )

This is the way to go when practicing diplomacy:

As you can see: Germany is full of dangerous things but I have mastered them all!!

One other thing that shows up in my yard pretty often (no idea where he and his kin come from) is a wild boar. I just kill it over and over again yet it still shows up. Oh well, I am not scared of that one so maybe it’s not that dangerous after all.

Oh, I almost forgot! I wasn’t allowed to get close but me mom was astonished when she found out the other day that apparently Germany also has water buffalos. I think they just looked like muddy moohs and they certainly smelled like them, too.

As you can see:

Germany’s wildlife is SO much more dangerous than any of yours!! I mean, it must be, otherwise I would be somewhere else protecting everyone from it.

Phew. Remembering all of this was exhausting, I need to go back to sleep under my little leafy canopy in the yard. There also seems to be a little more air outside so I think I’m gonna head out.

I hope I get to take over this blog again, you just never know with mom.

goodbye folks from far away, in the hopes that you can now sleep soundly knowing I have everything under control (well, apart from me mom, maybe, but I’m working on that)

yours

Manni

Days befitting my rank.

 

Hey folks, come closer! I’ll tell you what I did last weekend.

Don’t tell mom I took over this blog, but I thought I’d give you my view on things for once. But shhhh, don’t tell..

So I know she told you about my Royal Carriage which we got because it’s just befitting my rank, really. But did you know, did you know that this thing actually converts to a carriage that’s pulled?? I didn’t!! So when I heard about that I kind of expected horses. Two white stallions, to be exact. Again, as befitting my rank, really. I mean, what else, huh?

So imagine my surprise when the folks got their old -I am not kidding- BIKES! out of the garage. I mean, the things that I used to run next to (and chased, if some stranger rode them, ahem..)! And you know what they did?? Do you?? They attached my Royal Carriage to one of them! Huh.

I was a little skeptical at first, after all, I am the one that’s supposed to be in front, checking everything out and see if it’s safe!! But as it turns out it was actually quite fun to ride in style.  And the folks let me check out the important places in between, so that they would know it was safe to go that way.

This is what the trip looked like:

Kinda cool, if you ask me. Finally, finally, the folks understood that it’s reaaaally befitting to be able to sniff all those good scents without having to get off of my palanquin! I was ready for someone to hand me the grapes but mom said they are poison for dogs. booooo!! She needs to work on her attitude, if you ask me!!

But at least I got her to do all the work:

So I was a liiiittle tired when we got back home. I mean, hey! That was a LOT of work for one day. And what do you think happened then?? Nooooo they didn’t let me have my beauty sleep, noooooooo. Instead, they dragged me to a restaurant.

Now, as you know, the best place in a restaurant is under the table for obvious reasons (like falling food) and, well-behaved as the folks mostly are, they let me have that place.

I don’t beg!! I am well behaved after all! (It’s just, It’s, just, really, YUMMY!!)

Boy, did I sleep soundly when we finally got home!!

And then came Sunday.

I thought I could sleep in but you know, if you live with people you have to keep them entertained. If only because the fridge is too high for me to reach.

So I humored my mom and went to the dog sport place with her. We hadn’t been in a few weeks because apparently people don’t handle the winter weather all that well. Duh, get a fur, idiots. But what can you do.

So I was still a little tired at first. (Yeah, we all know who’s to blame for that…) But after a while I remembered that I actually like that stuff. And I kind of like my mom’s expression if I make an effort, so it’s all good. Here’s my Olympic Medal Moment:

I know! I’m cute, right??

ssshhhhh, that guy? he’s oooold! I really don’t know what he’s doing in my Olympics group! He’s kinda nice, though.

oh, oops, gotta get off this keyboard, mom’s coming! See ya later folks, and remember, no telling!!!

Gotta run!

Manni  ♥♥

 

Pig Killer and Lazy Smartie-Pants

As you can see: wonderdog is doing better again. While I was worried about him the last two weeks he is now finally back to his boisterous self. We were at the vet’s on Friday and they said we should have x-rays taken, just in case, uhm, as you know, time is against you, uhm, maybe the stomach issues are just symptoms of, you know, lung…. What? er, ok I guess. *sweating*  But! clear x-rays! again!! (and the next x-ray appointment in 3 instead of 6 months. “you know, time is aga…” “yes I know! I don’t need you to tell me that, just give me the appointment”.

Then, of course, followed another weekend, more excitement.

Saturday morning was enchanted-forest time again. A beach is fun but nothing beats a good run in the forest, says the silly dog. The boys had some fun:

So after playtime on Saturday morning, guess what happened at night:

you have a WHAT for me??

I love me a pig!

Can I, you know? Kill it?

Yum!

So that was our Saturday. Oh, hang on, we also had the UPS-guy there with a huge package that we had been waiting for. We used to be pretty active and would take day-trips with Manni or he would run next to our bikes. Of course since being a tripawd things have kind of slowed down for him and biking was out of the question while we had a foldable cart for him for the bigger trips. That worked ok but we always had to lift Manni in and it was not all that comfy for him. And now, we have a new buggy!! I was really excited because that one has a drawbar for the bikes and a stroller function. So, you know, what do you do when you have new gadgets? Right! You have to try them!

I was a little anxious if Manni would actually go in that thing since he’d never seen anything like that before, it moves, and so on. I needn’t have worried of course. After hopping next to it for all of 10 minutes he hopped into it without any coaxing. just like that. That in my mind is SO clever. I mean, for the dog to go: Ok, they got me this new thing for when I get tired, oh, I’ll just hop in. That’s amazing! Probably the harder thing now will be for us to tell him that this in no way excuses him from exercise!! 🙂

Comfy, this!

Hey! I can see you!

Hey! I can see you!

So, you can see: off to new adventures we go in the weeks to come!! Can’t wait! (Ok, it’s a liiiiittle cold for me to be biking just yet, but that will come, too)

I hope you all had a good weekend, too!

Tina and, of course, Manni

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